tired

yawning~

yesterday night i decided to burn midnight oil. however, according to my biological clock my eyelids will be shut off by themselves automatically without listening to my impulse sent from my brain which tried to stop them to do so. ouch, so, i tried someone's method, drank a cup of coffee. it contains CAFFEINE.

sipping the coffee by bit and served it with jacob's crackers. it's quite a nice supper.

...

time flied without me realising how fast its speed was. it's 11.

wow.finally i had passed that ' it's sleeping time!' 's test...normally it happens at 10.

...

20 mins later i guess, my sight was blackened out. when my sight was clear again, the clock showed 3.

coffee method is not effective to me. i desperate need a new way to encounter this problem. smart drugs?

HAH! kidding.

appreciation

sometimes it is good to make a stop and turn our head around. our scope is too small yet we are always seeing the matter in front of us, it does make us to head forwards without realising the continueing steps do lead us to the repetition of the same mistakes. i now would like to take a stop, twisting my body to the back, there's 10cent on the floor. oh.

dont underestimate the power of this tiny cent. it costs you 2 sweets, artificial glucose which is also one source of energy suppliments. or for some people, the sweet does give them a moment of happiness.indulgement in craving of sweetiness,huh. nevertheless, moderation must be bare in mind as always.

apart from that, i saw something.

(can you listen to it? a breaking chain.haha..)

ah, the weather's forecast says no thunder and lightning for today. appreciation is raised from the bottom of my heart.

fire

=)

my mom was right. something was missing within myself. she asked me to find it back.

'' where's the 'fire' within you? you have lost your heart arent you?''

will it be too late for this? so called a 'fire hunt'.

a friend said that im not the carmen she knew in the last few years. i am drowning in the sea of pessimation.

i give myself a limited time to get that back.

this is another kind of attachment, let it be a part of my training of the attainment of nibbana.

meat

everything will go fine soon.

i just got my body checkup report. thankx for that, i have to take pill everyday after having my breakfast. roughly at 4 or 5 am?

my haemoglobin count is below the average range. my mom was worried about it. it could be listened from her sentence.

'' oh dear, pork and chicken for tomorrow's dinner. it's serious. i have to do something for it. if not, pregnancy is not allowed in your future.''

''......''

''mom, im just a kid.''

''......''

太棒了!

华语吔!

^^

我今年十九了,但妈妈说我依然是个长不大的孩子.

昨天是我人生第一次做血验报告,心情异常兴奋. 不安的心使两颗眼球望东看西的, 就是很不安分. 约三十分钟吧, 身穿蓝制服的护士念出本人的小名.

'' 啊,到我了.''

'' hey, how are you? fine?''

''oh, yeah. im fine.''

''嗯, 他总是这样问喉他的病人吗?不应该吧. 生病了, 还fine吗?''(想)

果然不出所料..

''arent you sick?''

''err..no,i am here to do a blood test.''

''haha,i see. but what is this for?''

''uni application purpose,doctor.''

''oh,which uni did you apply to?''

''IMU, doctor.''

''..''

''pharmacy, doctor.''

''oh,haha''

''place your arm here, yeah, just to check your blood pressure. oh, pharmacy, so in the future you should prescrube the drugs to me.haha.''

''har? oh..okay.''

''k, you may now follow my nurse to do your blood test.''

''oh, is it painful?''

''haha, dont worry. she is great in that. not pain at all''

''wow, that is great!''

这并没降低我的不安...我们走进了另一间房子.

''urmm..is that painful?''

''tak sakit.''

''saya takutlar''

''tak perlu takut. pegang ini kuat kuat, tau tak?''

''oh, boleh boleh.''

''妈...''

''不痛的啦,看着老妈,我陪你说话就是.''

''呜...''

不负众望,真有她的,顶点不疼.

....

''so,you will probably receive your report by next week. is either monday or tuesday, i will give you a call.''

''oh, thank you doctor.''

''welcome.''

...

''还说要去捐血,看你酱样子还能去贝..''

''....妈,第一次!就不能相信我呐..''

过后还有另个验身报告,那个呀,就糗大了. 不说.





我一定会捐的,让她看好.

trainee

urmm...im not going to be a doctor in the future. but i read this article in the newspaper and i found that it is funny (lol). perhaps it may be useful to those who want to be a doctor next time.

ps: it is a real story based on someone's experience

20 years ago there's a man, a young man who was still a trainee in UK hospital. oh you guys must have heard of doctor's 24hrs on call. so, he had some kind of device and always placed it into his pocket. and once there's emergency, that device will start to make noice for instance '' tu tu tu ?''. i never listened to this noises made by this eletronic device, that tut tut is just my imaginary sound =)

he was very nervous everyday until the elders could read that on his face.

'' relax, my young fellow. let's have a break at the cafeteria. the curry there is nice.''

so he did take that advice and went to have curry rice. ouch..the uk's curry is totally diff wif m'sia's curry. something extra...green apple slices and raisins. i couldnt imagine how it tastes. or perhaps ... sweet and soury within the spiciness?
while he was trying to swallow a bite of it, something happened.the device. he stood up as reflex reaction, rushing... running to the surgery room.

and he was the 1st doctor and be the 1st trainee arrived there.

the nurse read out the patient's info to him.

but his mind was blank and couldnt process any info read by her.

he was panic.

he felt his heartbeat and his body...shaking.

Exercising after eating is just no good. he ran to the room just right after swallowing the curry, wow, his stomach started to reject which's like an alien to it.

he vomitted

this made the situation even worst.

his face turned red due to embarassment.

'' should i either look at the patient 1st or clean up the floor? ''

he thought

he looked at the nurse and the nurse looked at him

''...''

''ahhhh....''

he fainted right in front of the nurse.

before he lose his conciousness, he merely listened to the nurse,saying

'' pull another new bed to here, we have to save two patients now.''

lolx....his story is an epic.

mama

well, tomorrow my mom will go to 1-U to attend her friends' gathering. meanwhile i will stay at home to accomplish the tasks given by her. as usual, she will increase the job capacity when im in my holiday. that is why the needle of the balance is still pointing at the same 2 digits number when an elephant's stepping on it...wootZ.

then, she was chitchating with her friend.

ahem, it's my honour to be one of the topics in their conversation AGAIN.

'' hey, there's been a long time i'd never see your daughter. will she follow you tomorrow?''

'' she will be staying at home.''

'' oh why? haha, nevermind then. by the way, your daughter is 18/9 already right? you must be making her up until like a princess. as what i knew your attitude till now, i guarantee that you wont miss this opportunity. and you are really a shophaholic and trendy.''

'' oh come on, Bxxxxxx. she just doesnt like me.''

'' ?''

'' she doesnt like fashion as me. she doesnt like to make up. it is a mission impossible for me just to ask her to apply some BBcream. i just ask her to wear a sleeveless shirt or a singlet and she finds that is so so so difficult for her to do so. a simple T and jeans are just enough for her. lolx ''

'' wow , she is indeed different one.''

....

by the way, i didnt listen to their conver in purpose, my mom and i just have a gene of loud voice. im quite proud of that,too. it happened that i was chosen as the leader trice because of this ability. (lol)

is making up, wearing nice clothes and high heeled a definite look to a girl?

anywhere, i dont really care about it (nah! see..as what my mom said.)

oh, ever heard of toywatch before? their watches are damn nice XD

the skeleton series ...><

sandbag

i need that a lot.

that matter couldnt be settled and it's just endless.

guys, or preferably men, would never change themselves even though they had gone through those nightmares before. the wound was sealed. but they just like to make more scars on the limited space, until it couldnt stand for more, it bleeds.

my fist is burning. but this is not the right time yet. patience makes no one is harmed. i do my very best to protect her.

yeah..soon

silent killer

life is full of obstacles, doesnt it?

who told me that we have the power of rullng our own lives?

i desperate need a proof now.

i want a ' thing '. for what i have planned till now is to achieve that goal, even though the process isnt that smooth going, the voices of rejecting or preventing me to go on further raised from somewhere but not everywhere, however i strongly believe that it will still be fine in the end, as long as i have that passion.

hmm...

..

my heart was half dying. my life was intruded by a silent killer 15 mins ago.

i need help in making my last word (lol)